Q:
What's grey on the inside and pink and white on the outside?
A:
An inside out elephant.
Q:
What is grey and not there.
A:
No elephants.
Q:
Why are elephants large, grey and wrinkled?
A:
Because if they were small, white and smooth they'd be asprins.
Q:
Why are elephants wrinkled?
A:
Have you ever tried to iron one?
Q:
Why do elephants wear small green hats?
A: So
they can sneak across snooker tables unobserved.
Q:
How does an elephant hide in the
jungle?
A: He
paints his privates red and climbs up a cherry tree.
Q:
What's the loudest noise in the
jungle?
A: A
giraffe eating cherries.
Q:
How many legs does an elephant have?
A:
four, two in the front, two in the back.
Q:
How do you get two Tarzans in the fridge?
A:
You cant, silly, there is only one Tarzan!
Q:
Why are there so many elephants running around free in the jungle ?
A:
Tarzans fridge is not large enough to hold them all.
Q:
How many elephants can you actually put in a fridge?
A:
Depends on the number of elephants.
Q:
What do you call two elephants on a bicycle ?
A:
Optimistic !
Q:
What do you get if you take an elephant into the city ?
A:
Free Parking.
Q:
What do you get if you take an elephant into work ?
A:
Exclusive use of the elevator.
Q:
How does an elephant get down from a tree?
A:
It doesn't, You get down from a duck.
Q:
How do you get an elephant out of a tree?
A:
Stand it on a leaf and wait 'till autumn.
Q:
What do you get when you cross an elephant with a kangaroo?
A: Bloody
great holes all over Australia.
Q:
How do you know if there is an elephant under the bed?
A:
Your nose is touching the ceiling.
Q:
What's big, red and slimey?
A: An
inside-out elephant.
Q:
Why do elephants wear sandles?
A:
So that they don't sink in the sand.
Q:
Why do ostriches stick their head in the ground?
A:
To look for the elephants who forgot to wear their sandles.
Q:
Why do elephants paint the soles of their feet yellow?
A:
So that they can hide upside-down in bowls of custard.
Q:
Did you ever find an elephant in your custard?
A:
No? Well, it must work so.
Q:
Why do elephants live in herds?
A:
To get a wholesale reduction on the shoes with yellow soles.
Q:
What do you do if an elephant comes through your window?
A:
Swim for your life.
Q:
What does Tarzan say when he
sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A:
"Look, a herd of elephants in the distance"
Q:
What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of elephants with sunglasses
in the distance?
A:
Nothing. He doesn't recognize them.
Q:
What does Tarzan say when he sees a herd of giraffes in the distance?
A:
"Haha! You fooled me once with those disguises, but not this time!"
Q:
What is the difference between en elephant and a plum?
A:
An elephant is grey.
Q:
What does Jane say when she sees a herd of elephants in the distance?
A:
"Look! A herd of plums in the distance" (Jane is colorblind)
Q:
How do you get an elephant into the fridge?
A:
1. Open door.
2. Insert elephant.
3. Close door.
Q:
How do you get a giraffe into the fridge?
A:
1. Open door.
2. Remove elephant.
3. Insert giraffe.
4. Close door.
Q:
How do you know there are *two* elephants in your fridge?
A:
The door won't close.
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